Tower to Copeland


Tower to Learjet, Tower to Learjet, come in please. This is Kenneth Copeland of the plane truth. Are you with Herbert W Armstrong’s bunch? I believe he publishes the plain truth. He spelled his plane a little differently besides he’s deceased. Let the dead rest in peace please. Tower to Learjet, are you coming in for a landing? No I think I’ll fly around a lot longer today. After all the ministry’s paying for the gas. And ain’t that a gas! Tower to Learjet, how did you swing that deal? You gotta know when to fold and know when to play them. By the way you can call me Sky King because I rule the skies. If I feel lucky I may even drag Jesse Duplantis’ weird jet. Tower to Learjet, weird jet? Old Jesse purchased one of my old Lear Jets for a paltry 4 million. It slips in second. Tower to Learjet, did you say he bought your old rear? Not rear, LEAR! Get your ears cleaned out. How’d you like to hear my latest song? Tower to Learjet, we’re losing our signal, thank God.

You know, old Jessie might like my rear? He’s kind of funny that way.

The 3 Stooges


Here we have Jesse Duplantis, John Hagee, and Benny Hinn. Why John Hagee is with these two farces is beyond me. Evil company corrupts good habits. Why Benny Hinn is still in Ministry is a mystery to me? He had an affair with Paula White and a minister is to have a good testimony to those who are outside the body of Christ. Hinn does not have a good testimony so why is he a pastor? Then you have Jesse Duplantis, the Milton Berle of religion. His ministry likes to get a lot of laughs but what he doesn’t know is that he is the biggest joke of them all. Then we have John Hagee. Some have called him anti-Semitic. Of the three he is into the Bible the most but with a jaded View of the scriptures. All these three are there by guilt of Association. Hagee, though, is somewhat biblical unlike the other two but he has a few drops of poison in what he preaches. And a few drops of poison can kill you. Maybe they should all go on TV at the real Three Stooges with Hagee as Curly Duplantis as Larry and Hinn as Moe?

CONVERSION THERAPY-1


What is Conversion Therapy? It is curing homosexual behavior so why aren’t more churches climbing aboard? Is it the way they go about it? Do you notice how many Democratic states oppose it? I personally oppose homosexuality but I also oppose psychology.  That is psychology void of Christ. But how much of conversion therapy comes from the Bible and how much does not? I’ll be checking that out next.

The Good Humor Man is Jesse Duplantis


Since when did The Gospel of Jesus Christ become a laughing matter? What is so funny about suffering for Christ? Yet Jesse Duplantis Stakes his entire Ministry on humor. I think he really enjoys playing the fool. He likes to get a good laugh only when is Ministry supposed to be funny? He might be better served playing the Court Jester for Kenneth Copeland his buddy and pal. To be fair some pastors inject a note of humor in their messages but it’s not the whole message of humor that Duplantis utilizes. He prances up and down his platform acting silly and playing out a roll of tomfoolery. I just don’t understand his approach yet his congregation laughs along with them encouraging him to do even more silly stuff. I’ve seen him serious. In the end Jesse Duplantis is laughing all the way to the bank and he has lots of money in that bank at his congregations expense. I wonder how much he’ll laugh when he one day stands before Jesus?

PRESIDENT TRUMP ADDRESSES THE NATION


Good morning to you all. For those not in the know I am president Trump otherwise known as the Donald. I am here today to update you on my spiritual counsel. After all they are the ones that got me elected. And no Paula, I was not about to pull the chair away from you. In fact once I found out what a crooked Minister you are I almost considered you for vice president. No offense Mr. Pence. I also didn’t know that half of you are being investigated by Senator Grassley. It seems you have a way of cheating the public without taking much Flack. I need to know how you do that for my dealings with the press and the Democrats. And, no, Mr. Copeland, you do not have an Air Force in the United States. In fact we’ll drag you in the air whenever you want.OH, MR. Duplantis, no cracking jokes during my news conference. I know you’re a riot at your church but I am in charge here. Keep it up and I’ll make you my court jester. As if I didn’t have enough problems already. By the way,  Benny Hinn? I would like you to take my dog for a walk now and teach him to heal. In that way he can lay paws on you and heal you of trying to have an affair with Paula White. She’s my baby and don’t you forget that. Mike Murdock? With your experience with money I may make you Secretary of the treasury. Just don’t use your wisdom keys to fleece any money from me. Yes this is the bunch of characters that make up my spiritual counsel. Juanita Bynum? I’d like to consider making you my secretary of defense only please take off that Miracle robe of yours. You look so silly in here with that on. Is Doctor giggle here today? Oh yes I see you now. Pat Robertson, I’d like to have you host a few Democrats on your program the 700 Club. Nancy Pelosi comes to mind. And maybe even Hillary Clinton? After all she needs some air time so she can Grumble some more about how she lost the presidency. Have I forgotten anyone? Oh Pat, will you please wake up Dr. Ben Carson again? He does that every so often. In conclusion, the Donald would like to say that I consider you all my friends but only if you get out the vote in 2020. Paula? I’d like you to speak to the country next week and persuade our citizens to surrender a month salary to help build my wall. You have a Church Without Walls but I want a country with walls. Thank you and God bless the United States of America and my company.

Pentecostal Congregations EXPECT a Show


I would like to introduce myself . I am Glinda Hermeneutics and it is my job to ferret out the truth. It’s a sad thing to say but Pentecostal Church congregations expect a show instead of Bible learning. They come to see Benny Hinn do slaying in the spirit, or Paula White browbeating her congregation to give a month’s salary to her Ministry and her Antics to get it, or to listen to Mike Murdock’s Seed Faith, or to want to watch Jesse Duplantis’ Comedy Hour. They don’t come to hear the gospel but to enjoy a performance. One leader had the children of the church jumping hysterically up and down to rid them of demons and the audience went wild. Is this what church has come down to? Pentecostal church services are increasing weekly as hundreds of people go into them. They find bible-believing churches boring. They don’t see the word of God as being living and Powerful. And until they do nothing will get better. Bible prophecy actually predicts this. The falling away comes first before the man of sin is revealed. We’re seeing the falling away right now so can the man of sin be all that far behind? This is your investigating reporter Glinda Hermeneutics reporting from Pentecostal Peril Land.

Prayer Requests Go UNREAD at Copeland’s Ministry


The prayer request sent to Ken and Gloria Copeland are never seen by the Copeland’s but their personal checks are. Like Robert Tilton before them, the Copeland’s have no personal contact with prayer requests sent to their Ministry. They are too busy to read them because they are using the money for ski trips to Colorado in his own private jet. They can spend the money but can’t take time to read the prayer requests. They have huge staffs to do that and they also have a machine that makes it appear as if the Copeland’s had read their prayer request. It is outright deception. Recently Kenneth Copeland and Jesse Duplantis said that God told them to get a new jet. They’re more interested in the cares of this world over that of living the gospel. They preach it but they don’t live it. In effect They’re laughing all the way to the bank to deposit your money that you send them with your prayer request that goes unread. Men that are destitute of the truth suppose that godliness is a means of gain. From such withdraw yourself and not your money. The Copeland’s are nothing less than con artists which appears beautiful outwardly but inside are full of hypocrisy. Instead of sending them money to waste on their pleasures and their various lusts find a local church to give to.

Pastor Qualifications


Two qualifications of a pastor are they are not to be greedy for money and they are to have a good testimony to those that are outside the church. As for the first qualification noted that would eliminate the majority of Pentecostal preachers today. Kenneth Copeland has his own airport for his 5 planes, Paula White told her congregation to donate a month salary or God would get them, Benny Hinn, Jesse Duplantis, Joyce Meyers, Juanita Bynum, TD Jakes, and many many more all are unqualified to be a pastor. The woman pastors automatically are unqualified according to the Pauline Epistles. What about those and let’s have a good testimony to those that are outside? Does Jimmy Swaggart when he had sex with prostitutes or Jim Bakker who bilked Millions of dollars from his followers? It would seem that the Pentecostal Church makes their own rules for pastors. And an literate congregation sees nothing wrong with that.

Why do congregations even allow such unbiblical pastors that flourish in the Pentecostal Church. They don’t follow the Bible one bit and no one seems to care. I classify the Pentecostal Church as an apostate cult. If the blind lead the blind both will fall into a ditch. Ezekiel 14:10 says, the punishment of the prophet shall be the same as the punishment of the one who inquired. Perhaps we should start listening to the word of God instead of the Godless Pentecostal pastors.

Tongues in Church Today


Without an interpreter? Is that required?Most tongue speaking today is for show, is gibberish, and done by women with no interpreter. Without an interpreter, tongues are not to used. The church is not edified God is not the author of confusion so please let everything be done decently and in order. Praise the Lord!

Satan’s “Name It, Claim It” LIE !!!


I’m sure you’ve heard Benny Hinn say this many times and he’s not the only one. You can almost pick out your favorite Pentecostal pastor and he’s done the same thing Benny does. Have they never heard of this scripture? Matthew 6:24 says, YOU CANNOT SERVE GOD AND MONEY OR MAMMON. I remember Jim Bakker saying that he had never heard of this scripture until he entered prison. He was a pastor for many years prior to that and it’s hard to believe that he never saw this verse from the middle of The Sermon on the Mount! The name it claim it phonies believe that can speak words into existence almost like magic. You know, it is Magic.

Now you know where the prosperity preachers got the name it claim it idea. I will create as I speak and that is abracadabra. And that is what I call the Abracadabra Church. You know it as the Pentecostal Church but they practice the same thing.

The Magic Kingdom of Pentecostalism is the occult. And here are its inhabitants.

People just destitute of the truth suppose that godliness is a means of gain. The Bible tells us, from such withdraw yourself and not your money. These pastors are Satan’s pastors having been taken captive by Satan to do Satan’s will. Press any of the categorical names below and you can pull up all the writings I’ve done on each one Again, withdraw yourself in Jesus name. Amen!

Duplantis- Keeping up with Kenneth Copeland


Jesse Duplantis has asked his congregation for a 465 million-dollar Lear jet. By the way, he already has 3 Jets. So does Kenneth Copeland but he just got a new jet himself for his own airport behind his house. Duplantis is trying to keep up with the Copeland’s. To me, they’re both plane crazy. Do you know why they don’t want to fly commercial? There’s too many demons aboard those planes! I wonder how many demons are supporting their lavish Ministries? I don’t see them refunding any of those demon dollars. Where will all the lunacy stop? I wonder if Jesse Duplantis has his own Airport? When will this verse from Matthew 6:24 sink in to Duplantis and Copeland? You cannot serve God and money!

Prosperity Gospel Pastors Claim Christ and His Apostles were Prosperous


Does this sound prosperous to you? Jesus said, you cannot serve God and money in Matthew 6:24.

It doesn’t appear his apostles were very prosperous either. Prosperity pastors teach a false gospel.

We are not, as so many, corrupting the word of God which is found in 2nd Corinthians 2:17. The word corrupting means making merchandise out of you. If you will recall Jesus chased the money-changers out of the Temple with a whip of cords. That would have been the prosperity preachers of today.